Welcome to Glenn's Blog!

Here I will periodically post random thoughts and stories about what's going on in my life and the world around me. As if anyone cared. But seriously, you've found your way here, so hopefully you will enjoy at least some of what I have to say, even if you aren't entirely interested in it. At the least, it should be a good way to waste time.

Of course, you can visit my website for more info about me, or feel free to email me anytime.

Tuesday, August 20, 2019

Tuesday Morning

It's a cool morning. That's saying something, after weeks of daily high temperatures near or over the century mark. It's supposed to be 'only' 89 today. Hooray for simple pleasures. It's fortunate in my job that I don't always have to stay cooped up in my office, as it was a delightful morning to stroll through the campus whilst still completing necessary errands for the State. And it's fortunate that I work on a campus that basically amounts to a giant park, laden with trees including dozens of redwoods. And occasionally, squirrels. And now, being the week before school starts, it's still pretty peaceful out there. It's still possible wander about and foolishly imagine that this park exists for only me. At least, for a little while. Next week, we'll be overrun with tourists, and those of us who are more permanent residents will just have to sigh in acceptance. Summer had to end eventually, after all.

It's been a decent summer over all, some new adventures and some old ones, and hanging out with or otherwise reconnecting with people I had more or less lost touch with in recent years. Another summer and another cruise to Alaska, but my first as a single dad. On the performing arts side, we're midway through our run of Gilbert and Sullivan's "Yeoman of the Guard" with the Light Opera Theatre of Sacramento, and the show has been going well and drawing decent crowds, who have had enthusiastic responses to it. So that's fun. I haven't actually seen that many people I know in the audiences, but perhaps that will change in this our closing weekend. I'll probably head out for drinks after Friday's show at least, just a way to unwind and celebrate all of the things that are ending. Summer. The Yeoman. Peace and Quiet. The usual end of summer routine.

What will this school year hold? What will the fall and winter hold? Who knows, who knows. I prefer to keep my mind and options open, I suppose. I'm still in the midst of dealing with all the changes of the past year. I suspect there will be a lot more to deal with in the coming weeks and months, as we approach what promises to be, for me, a whole new sort of holiday season. Last year's was a bit of a mess for me personally. But that's all over now. Now, I trudge along, day by day, and I'll see what unfolds. Perhaps that is too passive of a way to go through life, I don't know. But there is a certain spiritual calm to it, just letting things fall where they may and trying not to worry about the minor details along the way.

Of course I may have to start interjecting some drive and ambition into things, just to spice life up a bit. We'll see.

But for now, it's only Tuesday, and there's still a few more days left for adventure before the semester starts. Onward.

Wednesday, August 14, 2019

Walk In The Night

So tonight was our first full run of Yeomen of the Guard, with a full 20-something piece orchestra and the cast in their full, period styled regalia. It actually went really well, I thought. This show seems to me to have a bit of a slower pace compared to other Gilbert and Sullivan shows. But the operatic sound is rather delightful and - dare I say - pretty. It will be interesting to see how this show comes off.

I got home a little after 10pm, which for any community theatre tech rehearsal is actually exceptionally early. After being home for a bit I decided to go out for a walk. I don't why. Because I could, I suppose. What other reason does one need?

Anyways, I started out around 11:30 and followed mostly the same path I usually go when I walk around sunset. But this time, it was quite different. It was...peaceful. Calm. Serene.


I experienced the world in a way that few people ever do, for no other reason than they simply choose not to. At first I only noticed the apparent absence of any sound within the dark canvas that surrounded me. But then the music of the night started to fade in, as if someone was slowly edging up the volume knob of a radio, higher and higher until it virtually begged to be noticed.

I heard crickets at first, perhaps only one or two initially, until they eventually grew into an entire army. There might be a whole bustling city of them out there, all past the edge of human sight. And then over the top of it, like a solo piccolo in an orchestra, came the tweets of a single bird. It was far in the distance, and seemingly tentative yet incessant. Repeating. Again. And again. As he threw his song out into the world, with no one but me and the crickets to hear, it seemed as if he was merely practicing. Testing out his voice, as it were. Probably he didn't expect anyone to be listening.

As I continued walking, I must have gotten fairly close to him, as his song grew more urgent, almost alarmed. He was probably spooked by my presence, since it's so unusual for him to see humans out at this hour. As well he should be. Creatures from my species are dangerous creatures indeed. But eventually he must have decided I was not a threat, for his song simmered down and continued on its original course.

I found that I could focus my hearing like an antenna, and I picked up the distant sound of cars on the freeway, which at this distance sounded almost like the crashing of waves on a beach. Steady and unrelenting. It's pretty easy, at this hour, to remove yourself from reality and transport your mind to just about anywhere.

As I walked, the day passed through that invisible marker of linear time: midnight. A new day had begun. The transition was so seamless that it wasn't even noticeable. A moment ago it was Tuesday, now it's Wednesday. Time marches on. Who really notices?

I wish I could reveal more hidden miracles of the world that I discovered on my journey, but unfortunately the reverie was broken by some idiots in cars doing donuts in a nearby parking lot. Why do humans have to go screwing everything up? It's almost like the moronic masses believe they've found their own distorted meaning of life. "Welcome to earth, your purpose is to muck up everything as much as you possibly can". And they do, they do.

It's a good thing the earth still retains a lot of beauty that mankind has not yet found a way to tarnish. Oh well. Time for bed.

Sunday, August 11, 2019

Click. Delete.

Well today was the Sitzprobe for the Light Opera Theatre production of Gilbert and Sullivan's "Yeomen of the Guard". The show opens this Friday and runs for two weeks at the 24th Street Theatre, a theatre I've been playing shows at now for 13 years. So, it's tech week. Late nights every night, and an abundant lack of sleep. Except for tomorrow, Monday - that's my only free night. I guess it will have to be my "party" night of the week. Most likely it will be my "close myself up in the house and draw the shades closed" night. Just me and the cats. So it goes.

I'm not quite back into playing shape yet. I mean, I haven't played the upright bass since...well last year's LOTS production I guess. The fingers tend to forget where they need to go. Just a little bit. But it will come back to me. Slowly but surely. I mean, it always does.

Hopefully I'll see some familiar faces in the audience for this show. I usually do. I've been around the block enough, this being my 34th or 35th show or so, that I've seen and met a lot of people who run in the musical theatre circles. New ones are always adding to it, to be sure, but many of the old ones are still there as well. It is fun, to be a part of that world, that family, again; I haven't had a lot of opportunities in the last five years. At least not as many as I used to.

So most of the rest of today, outside of rehearsal and after turning over Connor for the week, I spent going through my substantial digital photo library on my computer. I've kept them pretty organized over the years, with albums chronologically ordered dating back to 2006, separated by events. This wasn't a stroll down memory lane, or at least it wasn't originally meant to be. It was meant to be a purging of sorts, to get rid of memories - and people - I just don't want to come across my screen anymore. I'd like to think this was an important step towards the cleansing of my soul, towards branching out into a new life and leaving the old one behind. But my soul still feels tarnished.

It's interesting to note how much photography has improved since 2006. Technology has grown leaps and bounds, and cameras today are far superior to what existed back then. Of course, my eye and skill has improved as well, I guess. You don't think about it much as you're going through life's events and trying to capture each precious moment. But I suppose after taking thousands upon thousands of photographs, anyone will improve. I have grown a lot.

You ever wonder what happened to all the people you've met over the years? Over the last quarter of a century at Sac State, I've seen thousands of people come and go. Some I used to be rather close to. To most I was not. Some have gone on and made remarkable lives for themselves. Most have not. Most have just melted away into the fabric of society, never to cross my path again. It is the way of things, I guess.

I was wondering tonight as I went for my sunset walk, what became of certain people I knew 20, 25 years ago. Before the time of social media. Before cell phones and text messages and all of those things that link us together in today's world. There were people I liked, people I hung out with, people I've subsequently never heard from again. Where did they all go? Do they ever wonder about the past, and what might have been had we taken a left turn here or there instead of a right? Who knows what may be different today, had one little thing, 20 or 25 years ago, worked out differently. Guess we'll never know. But it's an interesting thought experiment, as I trudge along the path watching the crimson sunset on the horizon. What may have been?

So now, back at home, as I sit at the computer remembering many times and experiences I've had - and remembering some even earlier that never made it to digital film - I cannot help but become a little nostalgic. All of these snapshots, capturing moments in time. I cannot help but wonder, What If? What if I had made one different turn, here or there. Or two or three. But I have to stay focused; I'm on a mission after all. Slowly erasing those memories and people that were once joyous parts of my life, but are now at best bittersweet. With emphasis now on the bitter, I suppose. So it goes.

Click. Delete. Click. Delete. Repeat. Goodbye.

Monday, July 29, 2019

Summer Breeze

In Sacramento, at least, there's one small bit of redemption from the hostile and unrelenting summer heat: the Delta Breeze. It blows in from the southwest and washes over the sun-soaked land, making this season a little bearable. I can almost forget my desire to live in an area with a more temperate climate. Almost. But that is still some years away, and won't really happen until a variety of aspects in my life return to alignment.

The cool evenings here make for enjoyable evening walking weather. And so I take advantage of the neighborhood I'm in and it's many biking and jogging paths. And the timing was in sync to enjoy the end of another day, as designated and punctuated by the passing of the sun down below our line of sight.

The sunset. What a marvelously simple thing to watch, as the sky paints a line of color along the entire horizon, slowly shifting from blue to orange, then pink to violet, and on to deep purple as is slowly dissipates into blackness. What a wonderful painter our little planet is!

And then the stars pop out one by one, saying, "Hello! Look at me! Here I am!" It's amazing that this little planet in the middle of nowhere is suddenly in the middle of everywhere, and simply by the act of turning around.

And, I think, it's important for us to turn and look around too. To notice the things around us and appreciate their existence. After all, you never know what (or who, for that matter) you might be missing if you don't look around once in awhile. Such are the hazards of getting stuck in a never-changing routine in life. Be careful! But take some risks, and don't be afraid to live.

Or at least, enjoy the cool summer breeze across your face anyway. It will likely be hot again tomorrow.

Sunday, July 21, 2019

Thinking, Not Out Loud

Have you ever felt like you're standing on the edge of a precipice, immersed in thought and on the brink of beginning to understand some great cosmological constant? I feel like that sometimes. Like some great human understanding is just tantalizingly out of reach. Of course it's possible this may be just some great internal delusion. But it's as if, for just an instant, your brain has awoken from some long dormant state and is demanding attention from your soul.

And then in a flash, it's gone.

I have long been pondering the underlying root condition of successful personal relationships. Why? Good lord I have no idea. It sounds like a dreadful waste of time. But no, that's not really true. It's on my mind more and more these days, as I forge onward into my status as a "single" person.

In life, relationships come and go. I'm sure I've written this before, but the reality is that all relationships can have only two possible endings: a breakup or death. There's no other way for it to conclude. (At this point, firm believers in an afterlife must be beside themselves and wanting to assert that relationships can and do continue past this life. That they can, in fact, last "forever"). Isn't that depressing? Neither one of those conclusions is particularly positive. It does not bode well for us humans, as we struggle so hard throughout our lives to maintain these relationships. To what end? Death or a breakup.


As I'm now (again) in between relationships, I again am pondering: what is it that makes successful relationships, well, successful? All sorts of cliche answers come to mind. Communication. Respect. Common values. And so on. And sure, these are all important points to maintaining a successful relationship. But I'm looking for something deeper. Something under the surface which can, dare I say, predetermine a relationship's capacity for success.

I think it lies in the brain.

No, really. What if what we really need is simply someone who exists on the same intellectual plane as we do. I say "simply" but it's really anything but. Perhaps, at our core, we need someone who can think like we do, and can inspire us to continue using our brain. We need to be...intellectually stimulated. No amount of communication or counseling or respect or whatever can save us, if our brain has shut down due to boredom.

Of course, everyone has a different level at which their brain becomes bored. We're all unique like that. Perhaps in the future, brain mapping will supplant fingerprinting in the identification process.

Am I crazy? Maybe, maybe. Maybe I'm just tired. Maybe I'm onto something. Really, I'm just thinking. But not out loud. That might get me committed. Or something.

Thursday, July 4, 2019

Sailing Home

Here we are in the middle of the ocean, slowly inching our way home. It's 5:45am on the morning of our last day aboard the beautiful Grand Princess. She's a beautiful ship, though aging now at just over 20 years old.

It's been a good trip. Connor has been the best he's ever been at sea, though still often rambunctious and loud. But he's eagerly gone to the kids club (after crying every time last year). And he's eaten more than he's ever eaten onboard. Though he mostly sticks to a routine. breakfast of pancakes, Rice Crispies, and a banana. Lunch of pizza. Dinner of alphabet soup and French fries and chocolate chip cookies for dessert. Repeat.

I did not see a whole lot of wildlife this trip, save for bald eagles which were everywhere in Sitka. And a lot of my time was spent corralling the wild Connor. But I did get to most of the naturalist's talks onboard, and explored the towns quite a bit. Did an easy hike I've never done in Skagway and explored the amazing totem park in Sitka before watching two rehabilitated eagles get released back to the wild.

All in all I'd say it was a successful trip.

One more day - and it's the 4th of July no less - before we return to San Francisco and back to the realities of life. But for now, just watching the ship sailing into the deep blue horizon.

Tuesday, June 25, 2019

Sailing Away

It's 8pm on Tuesday, June 25. We've been on the ocean since just after 4pm, sailing north from San Francisco towards Alaska. This is almost become a sort of religious mecca for me, as it's now my 15th cruise overall and 6th on Princess, and 5th time to Alaska.

I guess you could say it kind of calls me. The beauty of the vast nature wonderland, the quaint towns, the peaceful serenity of a slower pace of life. Cruising, and visiting Alaska, are certainly great ways to escape the harsher reality of the fast paced city life engulfed by work and school.

It's nice to get away.

This is my first vacation alone with Connor. Well to be fair, it's not entirely alone as most of my family are also on this trip. But me and Connor are living the bachelor life in our own cozy ocean view stateroom. He fell asleep clutching his new box of Crayola crayons. I'm just watching the world slowly pass by and the sun slowly dip down into the horizon. Wild bachelors, we are not.

We'll see how much of a real vacation this is for me in the end. In the meantime, we're sailing away into the ocean blue. And oh yeah - we saw some whales spouting from our window a little while ago. Onward.

Wednesday, May 22, 2019

Walking In a Winter Wonderland

So I've just returned from a three-night sojourn to South Lake Tahoe. Sort of an end-of-semester getaway, to celebrate another completed school season and take a needed break from the extreme busyness of the last few weeks.

It was not the trip I expected.

Of course, booking six weeks ago, who could tell what the weather was to be like? I had originally considered going back to San Francisco, to my usual go-to decompression destination. But the hotel rates were higher than I wanted to pay. So I thought, why not Tahoe? I hadn't been there in awhile, and it's full of nature and beauty. And fresh, clean air. So I went. And it snowed.

It was like being in a Christmas song, waking up each morning to a winter wonderland of snow. So unexpected for late May! I was fortunate to be driving up there in between the unseasonably late storms, so the roads were at least clear. And actually it was sunny and clear for the first full day, so I made use of the time and took a drive up the eastern shore of the lake, stopping to hike around Spooner Lake and to explore the incredibly beautiful Sand Harbor. Both of which were new to me, and picked simply by virtue of being a little dot on a map from the rack of brochures at my hotel.

After that, it was cold. And the world was bathed in white. But I liked it. I didn't grow up around snow, and frankly have spent very little time in it. None, really, as a child. Though winter stories always painted pictures of it. I walked through gentle flurries, caught snowflakes on my tongue. Just like a holiday tale full of wonder and nostalgia, though for me a first time experience. It was nice. It was beautiful. It was a photographers paradise. It almost felt like Christmas. A Christmas I never experienced.

I decided to let myself live a little, which is a fairly rare prize for me to offer to myself. I took in a comedy show. And a magic show (that was more comedy than magic). I dined at a different location for every meal. I bought cookies and chocolates and had more than a dozen cups of cocoa (the hotel had free cocoa in the lobby; what a dangerous thing to offer). I did no fast food, only sit-down dining experiences. To rest, I read by the balcony window of my second-floor hotel room while watching snow gently float down unto the boughs of trees and the ground below. I bought presents for my son, who was back in Sacramento with his mother. I gambled a little, at three different casinos, and came out $23 ahead overall (which for me is quite a lucky streak).

It was a nice trip, full of explorations and experience. It was also a little lonely. As trips these days can be.

But now I'm back home, and tomorrow it will be back to work. Though, at least with the semester finished it will be quiet. Tranquil. In that way not unlike my little vacation. But without the 30-degree temperatures.

But when I look out the window tomorrow, the winter wonderland will not be there, beckoning to me. If I take a walk it will still be through a forest, of sorts, but without the satisfying soft crunch of snow beneath my boots. But maybe I'll close my eyes and remember what it was like to walk in a winter wonderland.

Sunday, April 14, 2019

Closing Show

It's nice sometimes just to sit and marvel at the beauty of the world. I'm not a particularly religious person, but if anything could provide spiritual contentment in this crazy society of ours, certainly the unspoiled grandeur of nature is up to the task. Despite humanity's best efforts to ruin it.

Today is the closing show of Mamma Mia at the Vallejo high school I've been playing at this week. I'm here quite early in town, on purpose, to enjoy a relaxing picnic lunch in Benicia State Park. A place I've never been before.

It's been great to have an excuse to pull out the Ibanez bass guitar and play again. Though it's been a whirlwind of a week. One rehearsal run through and then opening night. And it's not the easiest of musical books either. Doubly so if you haven't touched your instrument in a couple years. Yes, a second rehearsal would have been quite beneficial. Despite the tiresome drive of 60 miles one way to get here. But it is what it is.

It's been fun, as it's fun music to play, and just in general fun to BE playing again. Even if it's just a small-time high school production. There was a time when I'd do 4 shows a year. Or 5. Or 6. And they were all four-weekend runs. But those days are past, just a distant memory now. Some of those companies don't even exist anymore. Now just having one week of a show, for me, is a rare treat.

So it will be bittersweet today as we close out the run with our fourth performance, and our first and only matinee. And even though it's 'just' a high school production staged in their cafetorium, it's been rewarding for me. Though I won't miss the commute.

How long will it be till I play again? Who knows, who knows.

Saturday, March 30, 2019

Trip Around the Sun

Here I am on the eve of my birthday, the eve of Cesar Chavez Day as well. It was nice of the state of California to grant a holiday on my birthday. What better present than to get an extra day off, or in the case of this year, a three day weekend. And tomorrow's my birthday.

This has been my 44th trip around the sun on this pale blue dot of ours. 44. It's just a number of course, and the numbers themselves have had little meaning but to denote the slow progress of time. But my how time has passed.

Some days it seems like only yesterday since I was a young, introverted, and socially awkward teenager starting off at college and into a brand new chapter of life. And some days it's amazing how many chapters have come and gone. Today's college students, the people I see and work with everyday, weren't even born yet when I first stepped foot at Sac State. Think about that.

Today was a busy day with a Golden Empire festival at school and Connor's final basketball game of the winter season. He made 4 baskets, including one as time expired at the end of the game. He's really come a long way. But I'm tired now from the long day today coupled with the long day yesterday with three concerts and festival setup. And yesterday started at 2:30am when Connor suddenly got sick and threw up all over his bed. And the wall. And the floor. And then he was fine and slipped back into peaceful slumber as I was left to clean the mess. The perks of extreme youth.

Up at 2:30am. Work till 8:30pm. Up at 5:30am. Work till 6:00pm. Oh well. Time is just numbers. Just another day, another weekend, another week, another month.

Another year.

Time is a friend to no one, really. It doesn't care who you are. It marches on and on, like a robotic army, ever nearer to and yet so distant from its final destination. So what have I accomplished in this latest romp around the solar system? I have to pause and think about that. I don't really know. Just floating along and observing the ride I suppose. And on it goes.

Here's to starting another trip around the sun.

Wednesday, February 13, 2019

Valentine’s Eve

Here it is, the night before Valentine's Day. Tomorrow they'll be people going giddy over the gifts and plans bestowed upon them by their significant others. And there will be those who proudly proclaim that it isn't really a holiday anyway. And there will be those who remind us that we shouldn't just show our affections one day out if the year. Not that people will listen.

This is the first time in, I don't know, 20 some years that I'm single. Without any romantic interest, as it were. It's a little strange, a little surreal I suppose. I'm not entirely sure what to do about it. Or if I should do anything. I'm not really used to not being "with" someone. But, I think, that's okay.

Maybe we all make too much out of relationships anyway. I mean, when you think about it, they're ultimately a pretty negative thing. Relationships can only end in one of two ways - a breakup or death. There's no other possible outcome. And neither is a positive thing to look forward to. I guess we just have to enjoy the ride as best we can.

So this Valentine's Day, I'm going to spend it laying in bed with my kitties, eating ice cream perhaps, and maybe watching a sappy romantic drama where the boy DOESN'T get the girl in the end. Like, I don't know. Titanic. Or something. It's a plan, of sorts. At least it sounds like an enjoyable evening to me.

Well, if we're not enjoying the ride, what's the point?

Saturday, January 26, 2019

Week One Done

Well the first week is in the books at Sac State. It actually was a pretty okay week. At least, it was fairly uneventful and rather predictable. Lots of students needing their forgotten locker combos, new students needing practice room keys. Faculty wanting to schedule their ensemble rehearsals and move their classrooms around. The usual.

It actually seemed a little slower than normal for a first week. Go figure. Well at least I got caught up on a lot of things I was behind on. Getting calendar stuff up to date. Scheduling things with the university. Getting staff work schedules out.

As an aside, I have the largest student staff I've ever had at 6 people, plus one additional swing person. And February is the slowest month, concert wise. Yet I'm having trouble getting everything fully scheduled around everyone's busy schedules. Maybe I need to hire more people.

Anyways, it's Saturday night, and as is typical with a weekend day with Connor, I spent an inordinate amount of time today at the park and watching Connor's favorite YouTube videos of families playing with their kids (Yeager Family anyone?).

If this all seems like rambling, well, it is. That's me now, apparently. A middle age single father rambling on and on about normal day to day activities, and recording them here for all posterity.

Maybe I should start a YouTube channel. I could be famous.

Monday, January 21, 2019

Semester Eve

Well here it is, the night before the start of the spring semester. Winter break is officially over. Usually the breaks seem to fly right by, and are over before I have a chance to blink. This one was draining and seemed to drag on. Not that I'm glad it's over. I'm never glad it's over. But mostly i think that's because I don't want to go back to work full time.

The spring semester is as usual a busy one at Sac State. I suppose that's a blessing, since the time there does move faster when it's busy. In this my 40th semester working there, I feel more than ever just burnt out. I'm tired. I don't really want to go back to it. I kind of want to travel. To explore. To enjoy the beauty that still can be found in the world. To find myself. Am I lost? Maybe, maybe.

I recall my last trip to San Francisco and the calm serenity of walking along the beach. Staring at the ocean waves. Watching the flocks of tiny birds running away from the incoming wave, running towards the receding waves. Not a care in the world. For me, I mean, not the birds. Of walking the city streets in the early morning just before sunrise. Watching the world come alive.

I want to go for a walk right now, one last breath of fresh air and peace around the surrounding neighborhood, such as it is. I can't though, as I have Connor this week and I can't very well leave a sleeping 5 year old home alone with the cats.

So I'm at home laying in bed and watching Lady Bird, a coming of age film that doubles as an homage to Sacramento. At least I get to see some sights of the city in it.

Tomorrow it will be back to the rat race. I'm sure I'll be inundated with all manner of returning students needing to be reminded of their locker combos and new students needing to be indoctrinated into the system of lockers and practice room keys and the general bureaucracy of college life. Should be...fun?

At least it should be busy enough to go quickly.

Well anyways, at next light it will be off to the races. I think I'll retire early tonight and enjoy this last evening of "freedom" in dreamland.

Thursday, January 10, 2019

The Day It Was Suddenly Real

It's 10 days into the new year. Have I had any epiphanies, embarked on any new adventures? Well no, not really. Not yet anyway. I've spent a little time organizing old photos, updating my framed collages with fresh prints. Going through my movie collections, pulling out things I know I'll probably never watch to be sold for pennies on the dollar at Dimple Records. Finding random things in the house to add to the Goodwill pile. In general streamlining my life. I guess in a certain manner I'm refreshing my soul a little bit.

I'm getting ready for a new adventure I suppose.

I'm recently separated, though not from my own design or decision. In two days my former wife will be moving out of our house, leaving me to start anew and find a new path in life. I'm really not sure where things will lead, or what will happen next. It's been a long time since I was "single". It will be a voyage of discovery I suppose, possibly through tumultuous seas. Who Knows? The unknown can be like that.

The title of this post is a song lyric reference to "So Big/So Small" from the hit musical Dear Evan Hansen. I had the good fortune of being able to see this show at the Curran in San Francisco a few weeks ago; I won an online ticket lottery to acquire a ticket for only $25 (the regular price for the particular seat I wound up in was closer to $300). The song speaks of a breakup, of a parting of ways. It seemed appropriate. In any case, come Saturday it will suddenly be real, and I'll have to take a first step forward. We'll see where it leads.