But seriously. Today is National Chocolate Milkshake Day. Not to be confused with National Vanilla Milkshake Day. That fake holiday was back on June 20. I find it rather ridiculous that we even have all of these "national" days.
There's a national cookie day. And a national chocolate chip cookie day. There's basically a "national" day for just about any mundane thing you can dream up. And it's not just junk foods, or even foods in general. Nor is it just pets or other tangible things we possess in our lives. It can basically be just about anything that anyone wants to have some minor celebration about.
Are we really this hard up for value in our lives that we need to have these days?? And just how many of these days are there, really? One per day? More? I honestly have no idea.
So I googled it.
There are over 1500! That's an average of over four things per day. So, what else is today besides National Chocolate Milkshake Day? Well, I'm going to tell you. Because Google is my friend. Today is also "national boss/employee exchange day", "national day of encouragement", "national hug and high 5 day", "national just one human family day" (huh?), "national video games day", and - get this - "national report medicare fraud day". Yes, there's an official day to celebrate reporting medicare fraud.
Oh. My. God. We've gone insane.
But don't worry, you don't need to keep track of all these, there's a website for that. Which is a good thing, because you can't be expected to remember that tomorrow is "national kids take over the kitchen day" and "national peanut day", to say nothing of it also being "national bald is beautiful day". And four others I can't be bothered to notate here. These sound like something I completely made up, created in an inspired spurt of sarcasm. And honestly, that's something I would totally do. But I didn't! It's all completely true! Look it up. Bookmark the site. You'll want to refer to it often.
Yes, this world has gone insane. Perhaps that is why I just focus on me and my son, and largely ignore all other events (and most people) that are still transpiring and basically just having the audacity to exist outside of my happy little bubble. I'm reminded of a line in the Disney/Pixar movie The Incredibles, spoken by the villain Syndrome: "And when everyone's super...no one will be". It's so true! There's so many "national" days for this and that, that no day is really special anymore. Except Christmas. And Halloween. I like those days. And nothing honored with a special day - whether it be cookies or peanuts or baldness or whatever - is special anymore, because everything has a special day.
But hey, at least I had a convenient excuse to get a milkshake today.
