Christmas Came and Went

Twas the night after Christmas...wait, how the heck did that happen? Every year there's such a buildup to the holiday season, with stores carrying merchandise before Halloween. And it seems there's so much time. And then you blink and - poof! - Christmas is over. No more holiday music on the radio station. The neighborhood yard inflatables have all collapsed in apparent drunken stupors from too much eggnog. The lights are slowly being turned off and taken down. And we're barreling unceremoniously towards the end of the year.

The Christmas season is my favorite time of year, but it's followed by the worst time of year. When the cheer suddenly starts dying away just as the days start becoming a little bit longer. And before you know it, it's all gone and forgotten. And the neighborhoods all look so...naked.

And this is the first year in which I did not have Connor at all, for Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. That's never happened before. I mean I guess it's fair, I had him all of last season while we were on a cruise to Hawaii. But in a way it's almost like Christmas hasn't happened yet. At least, my tree still has presents under it. Quite a lot actually...maybe I should unwrap and store a few. Most of what I got him was practical things I would eventually get anyway. Like clothes. And soccer cleats.

And my lights and decor will stay up at least through the weekend. On Sunday I'll get a little throwback celebration to remember the season by. Lived vicariously through a 12 year old, but still.

I bought myself a present for Christmas. New glasses. As seen in the picture here. Ho Ho Ho. Well, it had been four years since I last had my eyes checked and got new glasses. It was time.

And the holiday WAS nice after all. Spent Christmas Eve with a dinner at my girlfriend's house in Lincoln, and Christmas morning at my parents (mimosas!), and Christmas afternoon at my brother's house (wine!). And I took my dad today to see a movie (Song Sung Blue, which, despite the impression of the previews, was not in fact a biography of Neil Diamond). So yes, it was a nice holiday. It just flew by in the blink of an eye.

And we got a nice winter storm this Christmas, complete with lightning and thunder as we drove home from my brother's house. And rain, rain, rain. But I didn't lose power - my camping lantern was charged and ready to go - and there wasn't much flooding here.

Well, I suppose there's always next year. But I'm not going to think about that yet. Not going to think about the New Year yet, even though it may prove to be a year of great change. For now, I still have a little bit of Christmas to go.

I'm Still Here

Yes, I'm still here. It's been so long, so many days and months have passed by. I sit now at my computer at my desk, in the bedroom of my condo in North Natomas. Another long day of soccer has concluded. One tie, one loss. My feet are sore from the travels. Connor is playing Roblox with friends online down the hall. 

He says, "Hey Garen, you know what would be sad?" But never finishes the thought. Kids get so easily distracted.

I just finished reading The Book Thief. The latest novel to pass before my eyes. I had watched the movie before, several years in the past. It was good. Thought provoking. Emotional. A story about an infamous time in the history of humanity, one that some people fear is at risk of repeating itself now. A time of Germany, in the era of World War II. With authoritarian government and the persecution of certain groups of people whose only crime was that they existed.

The book is better. Isn't it always though?

It's about a girl, torn from one life and put into another, who has to live through such terrible times and see such terrible things unfolding. And yet finds beauty in words, which she comes to hate at the end as they seem to be nothing but a representation of the evil known as man. And then her world explodes. The story is told from the point of death - the spirit who collects the souls of those who are no more. His final thought, as narrator of the story, is this: "I am haunted by humans". I hope that doesn't ruin the ending for anyone.

The girl, too, begins to write, and not just read. She writes the story of her life. Her autobiography. It saves her life, quite literally. But of course it reminds me of this blog here, the story - sort of - of my life. More of a list of random observations and a narrative of some things that have happened, here and there. An exercise in writing and preserving one's own history. Much more clumsy than her story, but I suppose it works. 

And so now, here I write again. I see I never put a picture to the last entry, from Christmas Eve, which was posted from my phone as were sailing around the Hawaiian Islands. Gently rolling. Up and down. Our last big adventure, before the holidays ended once more and school and work and soccer resumed. I guess I will go put a picture to it now. And maybe find one for this one. But which one?

I have, just last week, turned 50. Not a lot of pomp and circumstance to celebrate the milestone. I went to San Francisco with a woman I've been seeing. It was a fun day. A picture from that day would be nice. It was spring break from Sac State. That's over now too. And Connor's comes up soon, and once again our holidays are separated. 

I am no longer in my upper-mid-forties. It hasn't truly sunk in yet. I suppose that's because I've never quite felt my age. Well, sometimes, I do feel old. But mostly I feel so much younger than I am. I wonder how long that will last. 

Well, anyways, I'm still here.

You should read The Book Thief. You really should.